Monday, October 15, 2007

The Butterfly Effect

I'm sitting here, when the latest issue of BussinessWeek, and just read this line: Bosses are particularly pessimistic about employment, with 34% saying they expect a hiring dip in the next 90 days. That's troubling, since the survey's take on hiring typically foreshadows the jobs numbers put out by the Bureau of Labor Statistics six months on.

Stupid, pessimistic bosses. If they only knew that by lightning up a little bit, it would be good for the economy.

But wait a minute, I thought. What if the bosses were pessimistic because employees were complaining too much? Maybe we should start taking a survey of employees attitudes, since clearly they're more inclined to complain to the boss when they're in a bad mood as well.

In fact, I'd go so far as to say we could be surveying the better halves of these workers, because if they're distressed, obviously it must be because of problems at home.

In fact.... to push this a bit further, if we survey the kids of such families, we'd learn early on when there are problems in the household, causing them to bring their problems into work with them, causing the boss to feel depressing, causing hirings to slow, and the economy to slow. We might be able to know the economy is in danger of slowing FIVE YEARS before it happens! Six months, ha. Think big, people.

Wait a minute, but what if the problems at home are because the boss cut the breadwinner's pay to save money. Money is the number one cause of problems in marriages, after all. Maybe it really is the boss's fault after all. =)

Of course, maybe the boss wouldn't have had to cut their pay if the employees worked just a little bit harder and stopped spending so much time on Atlas Quest or any other noteworthy website. Of course, if I didn't create such an amazing website, people wouldn't be able to use it.

Maybe it's really my fault. Did my lone little website cause the fall of the global economy? Yikes! Sorry about that, folks. I'll try not to let it happen again. =)

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